I’m currently on maternity leave. For the few readers I have that comes to no surprise. However, when on maternity leave you have your precious, your best creation, the apple of your eye constantly on you, with you. 24/7 you are needed. In every sense of the word.
Your needs are no longer any kind of priority. I’ve honestly almost peed in my pants, a little pee did come out, because I held it for so long as Alfie needed me or needed me to do something or just be there around him. When I finally had a few moments to go to the loo it was almost too late. Not to worry – most of the wee did make it into the toilet.
But what I’m trying to get at here is that as a new mum I’ve realised that me time or alone time or whatever you want to call it, time for just me with only me, is an exotic dream. The few times I can actually enjoy a long shower is like taking a mini holiday. Or just the thought of being able to go for a poo without having to stress it out because Alfie might need to be picked up because he’s fed up with whatever he’s doing in that moment.
Don’t get me wrong, I go about my toilet business in a healthy way but I miss the days when I didn’t have to stress in and out of the loo or shower.
Yeah sure I could book hairdresser appointments or something to get out of the house without the baby, but that comes to a cost and being on statutory maternity pay in the UK is in no way luxurious. Also, the days that Jack isn’t working I want us to spend time together as a family because he doesn’t get much time with Alfie or with me otherwise.
Speaking of Jack, he plays cricket. Which means 18 weeks of the year he is playing cricket every Saturday. Every. Saturday. Every. God. Damn. Saturday.
And has practice once a week if his work shifts allow it. I wish I could get an escape once a week every week. Just imagine, a day spending time with my friends, doing a bit of an activity (let’s be honest cricket is like the least effort sport) and just have a great time. Maybe even have a few drinks at the end of the day. Get a full day away. Every week.
That’s the dream right there. No family responsibilities just me and my friends. What hobby/sport/bullshit can I come up with to get a full day away every week? Oh no I can’t cuz I’m a mum and supposed to be on call 24/7. Fun times.
Once Alfie is old enough to make his own food and stuff I guess it’s my time to do something. Until then I’ll continue with my mini-holidays in the shower. Ok. Bye.
Enjoy your day and hopefully you’ll get to sleep well, even if it’s only five minutes at a time.
X
Sofia Eiworth 
I feel your pain, i went through this too. Hardly anything seemed to change for my husband, but my whole life changed, who was i anymore if not feeder, poop cleaner, and all round child entertainer. I started to feel quite isolated. I spoke to my husband about it, and in the end i tried to get at least a solid 2-4 hours to myself once a week, go see a friend, window shop, go for a walk and a coffee. I left my son with my husband, and allowed him to have some bonding time too. Even if you can get a couple of solid hours a week, its important to have recovery time. Being on maternity or at home mum is harder than most people perceive. I hope you find time for yourself soon. X
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Thank you so much lovely! Yeah I know. I do leave him with his dad every now and then. But it’s that consistent time every week. And cricket is a full day away. And it’s about priorities as well. When we have time together I prioritise that for us as a family. He goes and plays cricket. But I need to start to take time for myself. I know I do. X
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